Sorry about not posting lately. Nothing wrong, other than it's too HOT outside.

For breakfast, I had the usual: Grammy's Pot Pie (yummm). Then, FatBoy let me lick the bowl after his lunch (lentil soup). Then, I started lettin' em rip and had to relocate after each microburst!

Sandra-Bob then offered this wisdom:

Beans, beans, the magical fruit.
The more you eat, the more you toot.
The more you toot, the better you feel.
So lift your leg, and let them squeal!

In addition to the new food FatBoy's giving me, I noticed he's changed what he's feeding the short dogs with long tails, too. Lately he's been feeding them EVO wet cat food on even-numbered days, and EVO dry cat food on odd-numbered days.

Pandora and Samantha must really like the wet food, because now they LINE UP in the kitchen when he prepares their dishes (on the even days). And they make the wierdest bark - sounds like "meow! meOW! MEOW!". I wish I could bark like that.

I know he thinks I'm a few pigeons short of a coop, but FatBoy's trying to wean me off food that's mostly corn. This week, he's mixing what's left of my regular food (30 pound bag) and something called AvoDerm. I like the new food a LOT, but now I see yet another different bag sitting up high where I can't reach it. The newest one is called Grammy's Pot Pie and I can hardly wait to try it!

FatBoy had it with him when he returned from the store where he got the New! Improved! peanuts for the blue jays, so I suspect he's found a new source for all of us. I wonder if that includes the short dogs with long tails? I noticed him looking at a website for diabetic cat food a few days ago. I suspect it's all related somehow.

Today it's raining again. I HATE THAT. Whenever I go outside to poop and it's raining, I get mud between my pads. Yuch!

Go ahead, pull my paw.

Laugh if you must, but I don't like it when FatBoy suddenly changes my food. The least he could do is gradually (over a week or so) get me used to the new stuff.

This happened last week, when he took me aside and said he could no longer find my Food of Choice (like I picked it out anyway) and had to switch brands .. to something called Goodlife Recipe. There for a minute, I thought he was deeply concerned that he had to switch, but then I realized he was Pulling A Hillary and the tears were fake.

Now (tonight) I caught him looking at Dog Food Analysis.com so he may be changing again when this bag is empty.

I don't know why he's concerned, other than the fact that the new brand lets me Toot On Command. Or when I'm sleeping at his feet. Whew! Who cut the cheese?

FatBoy gave me a JumBone this morning - I'm not sure what I did to deserve it.

It's nice outside - already 13C and going to 20C by 5pm. So, I went outside and rolled upside down in the grass. Now, FatBoy's laughing at me because of all the dry grass on my back. Personally, I think it looks *stylish*.

My breath's not bad - is it?

Today, FatBoy came home from some place called "Sprouts" (I read the bag) and had a box of Good Buddy dog cookies from a company called Castor & Pollux. He's brought home their cheese cookies before, and they are very tasty.

Today, however, he bought their "spearmint & parsley flavor" which is supposed to improve my breath. Harumph! My breath's already perfect, and doesn't need improvement. To prove it, I'm gonna go chew on my possum in the backyard again ... then breathe on everyone in the house. Mmm .. minty fresh!

What a day.

I've been limping the past few days, ever since Miles (my BFF) left. So FatBoy apparently called The Vet and pretended not to be concerned, but I knew he was. He still has pictures of Tori (she was a black Lab before me, who died of something called "mast cells"). Apparently her downfall started with a limp, too.

Anyway, I stopped limping when Vet Day rolled around (what exactly is "Murphy's Law" anyway?). But I couldn't see Doctor Freeze (why does the vet keep his stethoscope in the freezer?) without having something wrong with me, so .. I spotted a bug on the sidewalk, just outside the vet's office, and proceeded to swallow it. Blech! I was frothing at the mouth for several minutes, before FatBoy led me inside. I was the only patient at the time, and we went back to The Tiny Room for a few minutes.

When the time had come to see Doctor Freeze, he led me to a back room, drew a blood sample and gave me a pedicure! It was then that I decided to Show Off and started frothing again, but I added a few spasms (dramatic effect). This seemed to concern Doctor Freeze, until FatBoy spilled the beans and told him about my encounter outside. I then decided to froth some more. Doctor Freeze said that FatBoy should watch me and see if this gets worse. As if!

Hey, FatBoy! Reach up there and hand me another Mr. Barky's - pronto!

Purina Naturals for cats

Purina Naturally Complete for Dogs

I'm not much into Change. Routines make me happy. FatBoy change my dog food. Me now eat Purina Natually Complete. It very yummy. I notice he change food for small dogs with long tail to Purina Naturals. Both "black one" and "fat one" like it muchly. What is "cat" anyway?

Now, I'm hungry. Woof woof.

I wish FatBoy would make up his mind. Thankfully, he gives me the same brand of food all the time - Beneful Healthy Radiance formula. I don't like change. I'm a dog, in case he didn't notice. We dogs like routine.

What annoys me (and maybe he'll read my blog, since he obviously doesn't understand my spoken word) is that he gets different kinds of treats. Most of the time, he comes home with those heart-shaped treats from Petsmart - vegetable or shark flavor. Don't get me wrong - they're crunchy and tasty - but then the next day he'll give me one of those all-natural peanut butter treats from Whole Foods Market. Don't get me wrong - they're crunchy and tasty - but then the next day he'll give me those heart-shaped treats from Petsmart - vegetable or shark flavor.

Don't get me wrong - they're crunchy and tasty - but then the next day he'll give me one of those all-natural peanut butter treats from Whole Foods Market. Don't get me wrong - they're crunchy and tasty - but then the next day he'll give me those heart-shaped treats from Petsmart - vegetable or shark flavor. Don't get me wrong - they're crunchy and tasty - but then the next day he'll give me one of those all-natural peanut butter treats from Whole Foods Market.

Oops .. here he comes .. gotta go! More later on this Very Important Subject.

I've been eating Beneful for a couple years, but not because I have much of a choice. FatBoy has never taken me to the grocery store, but I've heard that he could take me to Petsmart.

I've never been much of a socialite; I prefer spending time around small dogs (with long tails) or humans. Most other dogs I've met just want to sniff my butt, although I'm not sure I understand why. I read on a website that I can know another dog's health by butt-sniffing, but there just has to be a better way.

The FatBoy returned! He gave me some cold French fries, which he says he got as part of a combo meal at a Burger King somewhere in east Texas. I scarfed `em down anyway.

The people who watched me while FatBoy was away were very nice, but I'll rest easier tonight, now that things are back to normal.

Sometimes, I think FatBoy doesn't think I'm smart.

Yesterday, he returned from fetching the mail (I can't do that because the box is too high off the ground) and removed his long-sleeved shirt and draped it over my back. For the life of me, I don't know why he does that. I can't reach back there to remove it, and I ended up walking from one side of the house to the other until it slid off somewhere. He seemed to think this was funny.

He did a similar stunt a few days ago. After buying something at the drive-thru, he brought home French Fries for me! This is always a lot of fun -- they're tasty, and he only eats the smallest (crispy) ones in the container. But this time, he'd place one or two between my shoulder blades. Argh! I cannot figure out how to get to them! I tried grabbing them with my tongue, but it's not long enough. Next, I tried reaching from the left side, instead of the right. Still nothing. And there FatBoy sits, laughing and pointing at me.

I'll get him back. Some night when he's sleeping, I'll gnaw off one of his legs. That'll teach him to torment me.

Does anyone have a copy of Campfire Songs translated into Labrador Retriever?

All the Humans are preparing for something called a "Hurricane," so FatBoy has decided that he and I (along with the short dogs (with the long tails) should practice by turning off the electricity and singing campfire songs in front of the gas-burning fireplace.

There are a few problems with that:

1- it's still September. It's over 100 degrees outside. It's too hot for a campfire. The short dogs and I vote FOR keeping the air conditioner on.

2- I'm a dog. I don't DO campfire songs. Look it up on Google if you don't believe me.

3- Now will you double-check my water bowl and food dish? I'm bored and hungry.

oh, man! cat food is Y-U-M-M-Y.

not that I can reach it, usually .. FatBoy keeps it on the countertop, where Black Cat can jump up and munch as much as she wants. But TODAY .. her tummy must've been upset since she coughed up the food in the big bathroom. Yes, right there on the floor, where I had easy access.

Mmm, mmm .. that stuff's tasty even after Black Cat "pre-digested" it.

Ah, fresh food. I polished off the last of the Beneful (Shiny Coat Formula) and FatBoy opened a new bag, so I'm sated for now.

I'm so glad he learned to leave the food in the bag, rather than dumping it into that plastic container. He has no idea how that plastic taste leaches into the food after a couple weeks. I might as well be eating a Barbie Doll: blech.

I wonder if FatBoy has read this article: American Kennel Club - AKC eNewsletter. Since I get to stay inside most of the time (in the air conditioning) I've never been too bothered by the Texas summer.

Yesterday, I saw FatBoy looking at one of those mail order catalogs, and heard him laugh. Later, when he went on one of his errands, I looked at the catalog and saw he was looking at a dog watering device, triggered by a motion sensor whenever I'd walk over to it. Yeah, right. Like I have the brains to use that.

FatBoy's never, ever given me a bath but I think I smell pretty dern good. I've sniffed the butts of a few long-haired dogs over the years, and they reeeeek!

Still, my favorite sniff was The Goat at the Richardson Animal Shelter (where FatBoy found me). I wish I could've spent more time with him (her?) as the bleats were unlike anything else I've experienced.

Today's the 15th .. that means I'll probably get squirted with that anti-flea stuff again. Yeesh.

FatBoy left me alone from 8-noon, when he stopped by to let me out for 2 minutes (what a nice touch) while he fetched the mail. To thank him for leaving me with Those Mutant Dogs (the short ones with the long, purring tails), I took a small dump in the library.

He returned about 7pm and was in for the night, alternating snoozing on the couch, doing something on the computer and text-messaging some friends. At least he remembered to change my (our?) water and feed me.

This new Beneful ("Healthy Radiance" formula) tastes good; it's supposed to keep my fur shiny so I don't itch as much.