In addition to the new food FatBoy's giving me, I noticed he's changed what he's feeding the short dogs with long tails, too. Lately he's been feeding them EVO wet cat food on even-numbered days, and EVO dry cat food on odd-numbered days.

Pandora and Samantha must really like the wet food, because now they LINE UP in the kitchen when he prepares their dishes (on the even days). And they make the wierdest bark - sounds like "meow! meOW! MEOW!". I wish I could bark like that.

I know he thinks I'm a few pigeons short of a coop, but FatBoy's trying to wean me off food that's mostly corn. This week, he's mixing what's left of my regular food (30 pound bag) and something called AvoDerm. I like the new food a LOT, but now I see yet another different bag sitting up high where I can't reach it. The newest one is called Grammy's Pot Pie and I can hardly wait to try it!

FatBoy had it with him when he returned from the store where he got the New! Improved! peanuts for the blue jays, so I suspect he's found a new source for all of us. I wonder if that includes the short dogs with long tails? I noticed him looking at a website for diabetic cat food a few days ago. I suspect it's all related somehow.

Today it's raining again. I HATE THAT. Whenever I go outside to poop and it's raining, I get mud between my pads. Yuch!

Pandora is one lucky dog - FatBoy found out yesterday that she has diabetes, too, just like Samantha. Why can't I have diabetes? Oh, woe is me.

I waited until FatBoy left the house, then I uploaded a photo of one of the short dogs (that purr) onto this website: Scrooge yourself. I wonder if anyone will notice?

I wonder why FatBoy's spending so much time with Samantha (the little black dog with the long tail) lately?

Every morning, he picks her up and strokes her until she purrrrs and then he gives her a little white pill, then strokes her some more. I heard him tell someone that she has "dye a beet ees" (or something like that). It must not be good, since she's been really out of sorts lately, just sitting in the hallway and acting groggy. She also had a couple accidents near her litter box .. very unusual. She's just not herself .. she hasn't even hisssssed at Pandora for several weeks!

Me, I've been hobbling around the past week after I stepped on something while running in the backyard. FatBoy's been giving me a "baby aspirin" (whatever that is) every day and I'm feeling a little better now. There's not much else going on, so I think I'll sneak into the living room and watch Animal Planet.

I hate it when FatBoy can't sleep through the night, because it interrupts my beauty sleep. And by now you probably know that I must stick to my routine. Every day, I want everything to be the same. From the moment the sun comes up and FatBoy lets me into the backyard (to do .. you know .. what bears do in the woods) .. and then he fills my water bowl, and my food bowl.

Some days (I think 4 days a week) he goes outside to get something called a "newspaper" off the front lawn. I think it falls from the sky in the middle of the night. The other days, he heads for the kitchen to feed from the refrigerator. I don't understand why he doesn't eat from a bowl-on-the-hearth, like me .. it's so very convenient .. just at the right height and everything. Maybe it has something to do with his desire to show off .. walking on only two feet instead of four.

Anyway, back to FatBoy sleeping through the night. I like to leap onto the bed at night and sleep, with the idea that I can take it easy for a few hours while the small dogs that purr guard the house. But, when FatBoy's tossing and turning it makes it harder for me to sleep uninterrupted, and I'm grumpy the next day.

Maybe if I smother FatBoy with a pillow one night? I saw that done in a movie once. But then, who would feed me and water me and let me into the backyard to squat and Do My Thing? Hmmm. I'm going to have to sleep on this. If I can.

Why do the short dogs get all the best toys? Yesterday, FatBoy came home with some yummy cookies (he calls them "dog treats") and he also had a small brush (comb?) which he used on the small dogs that purr. Neither of them has a name tag like mine, since they never-ever get to go outside - he must be punishing them.

It seems like the little dogs with the long tails have their own "annual examination" coming soon - they each got a postcard from Doctor Freeze. Why do they get all the fun? I wanna go! I wanna go! I wanna go!

Anyway, back to this new comb. I heard FatBoy tell someone on the phone that he paid ONE DOLLAR for it. Geez, that sounds like a lot of money, the way he emphasized it. "A DOLLAR!" he said .. "ONE ENTIRE DOLLAR!!".

Anyway, the little dogs seem to like it. The fat dog rubbed up again FatBoy's leg this morning, and he scratched her back and she started that purrrrrring again. Geez, I hate that! I have tried and tried and tried and tried and tried and tried to purrrrr but I can't. Mine comes out like a growwwwwwl.

I think I figured out why FatBoy likes the little dogs better than me; they've learned how to do something called "purr". Apparently it involves rubbing up against something (either a cardboard box, or furniture) and making a low, rumblng sound. Maybe they're hungry? FatBoy keeps their food bowls out of my reach, so I can't tell if they're out of food. And no, they are NOT welcome to eat MY food (which is kept at ground level) ... I'm not much into sharing food. It's okay to share the couch .. they can even touch my butt if they want, but I draw the line when it comes to chow.

Still, I must learn the secrets of this "purr" thing.

I don't think it's related to Purrina (the name on the bags of food) but I'm not yet sure what to make of it.

Meanwhile, I have a new hobby, but FatBoy doesn't know it yet. I'm learning to install "Puppy Linux", which would be easier if I had opposable thumbs. More on this later ...

I'm bummed. Yesterday, I got to see Dr. Freeze and today, the two small dogs (with the long tails) had their turn.

Seems that FatBoy was waiting for a conference call to begin, and noticed that both of their rabies vaccinations expired today. I guess those vaccines are very precise, and if he'd waited until just after midnight, they might've contracted rabies and come looking to bite ME!

Anyway, he did that over his lunch break today, so now I can sleep easier. Whew! That was a close call. Guess I should figure out how to complain about FatBoy to the SPCA of Texas.

My good friend Miles (another Wonder Dog) arrived Sunday night. It is sooo nice to have another canine in the house. Sharing it with one human (FatBoy) and two short dogs (with long tails) is okay, but when you have someone of your own species around, well .. life is gooder*

* please pardon my lack of grammer sometimes. I pick up what I can by reading the old English textbooks, but (without opposable thumbs) sometimes it's hard to put them back on the shelf.

Yesterday, we were minding our own business in the backyard when an Evil Feline (feral, no doubt) attacked Miles, without provocation. Naturally, I rushed to help and succeeded in minimizing his injury (a scratch on his nose) .. but now I'm wondering if this dog has given birth to doglets (or whatever young dogs are called) under the backyard shed. Hmm. Life as a bitch (female dog) is a bitch.

well, I almost tore the fence down again. those squirrels were running along the top, and I did my usual BODY SLAM against it, trying to make them fall into my mouth, but it didn't work. come to think of it, that has never worked. but I'll keep trying. I hope FatBoy doesn't notice where I dislodged the fence planks. maybe I can sneak out when he's not looking, and eat one of those short dogs (with the long purring tails) that live across the street.

oh, man! cat food is Y-U-M-M-Y.

not that I can reach it, usually .. FatBoy keeps it on the countertop, where Black Cat can jump up and munch as much as she wants. But TODAY .. her tummy must've been upset since she coughed up the food in the big bathroom. Yes, right there on the floor, where I had easy access.

Mmm, mmm .. that stuff's tasty even after Black Cat "pre-digested" it.

Jill Bob sent FatBoy an email with some Cat Haiku: how revolting. He laughed, but I didn't see the humor.

Since I recently learned to use A9, I easy found some Dog Haiku that's much more on target. Maybe I'll write some of my own?

I don't know what it is about small dogs with long tails, but they're not welcome in my yard. Since you probably read my blog, allow me to address you directly:

The two small dogs who live with me (the black one and the fat one) are okay. They both let me chase them sometimes, or we run through the house together. But you neighborhood dogs come into my yard (even under the pecan tree in the backyard!) and I never, ever gave you permission to do so.

Maybe if I could just bark (talk) to you, we could reach an understanding. I'll stay inside the house, except when FatBoy lets me into the backyard for some R&R, and you stay the heck off my property!

Don't think I don't see you taking a dump in our flower beds, or sitting under the tree waiting for a squirrel to come into range! And yes, I know that you can catch and kill a squirrel when I can't (you're smaller and quieter), but don't think for a moment that I'm granting you a free pass.

I'm watching you, Dog. Maybe one day we can chat (bark) about how our roles are defined?

Okay, that's done. I've had my say. Now, time to go back to guarding the house.

Okay, so one thing's good about living here with the two small dogs (with the long tails): AIR CONDITIONING. It was 100 degrees outside, but only 78 inside so I spent as much time as possible crashed on the cool marble floors. I'm too short to reach the thermostat, but FatBoy seems to check them often enough.